Since my last post I've written several times, but have not chosen to publish. Sometimes I feel that I have a really good idea, but when I see it on paper (or, in this case, screen), the point I'm trying to make is unclear. Posts covering race reports, training, and travel are much easier - here's what I did in sequential order over this specific period of time. And, since this blog is mainly a personal account about my running experiences, it kinda needs to have race reports, training comments, and news about travel. In a way it is my personal scrapbook or logbook of things I do.
But every now and then, I have deep thoughts. And those I rarely write about. Or, if I do, I'll only put down my musings in moleskin notebooks that I have used as a repository for writings of a more personal nature for years. So lately there has been a bit of spacing between posts on this blog because I don't want to turn Running Conversations into something other than a blog about running and running-related endeavors.
The other day, the app, Insight Timer, told me I had hit 150 straight days where I had spent time meditating. That seemed like a pretty good number. To me, it meant that devoting even a short time each day to sitting and concentrating on breathing, or (infrequently) following a guided meditation, actually has become a habit. And that is something I desired to happen when I first began to sit. When I started meditating about 8 months ago, it was important to me to try to turn off my phone, my computer, radios, TVs, and attempt to clear my mind of thoughts blowing through it at the staggering rate that they seem to do with all the stimuli that surrounds me on a day-to-day basis.
Of course, for years I had used running to do just that. But running was/is different. Running can be the best solitary thing a person can do (in my opinion). But it can also be a vehicle to interact with friends as well as a time to listen to music or podcasts. And running has more than its share of distracting electronic devices outside of phones and iPods. The smart watch may be the single most insidious distraction to runners trying to 'get away from it all'. It used to be step counts. That turned into GPS. Now add heart rate monitoring and touch screen. I know plenty of runners who don't run without these devices anymore. And honestly, there isn't a single thing wrong with that. I run with them on plenty of occasions. But they have nothing to do with my real reasons for running.
On solo runs without electronic devices, I find that I am much more in tune with my body and mind. I see more nature. I find much more at which to marvel. I know the adage made famous by Alexander Supertramp (AKA: Chris McCandless - someone who I admire greatly), that life is best when shared. Yet like AS/CM (in practice if not in desire) we really do learn a lot about ourselves when we face challenges and spend time in nature by ourselves.
During trail runs over the past couple of weeks, I have experienced two moments of clarity. Both were maddeningly fleeting, but very intense. I will never use a term like 'enlightenment' to describe what I experienced, but the moments were sudden and intense. I recognized them for what they were and continued on my way - feeling much better about the world I inhabit. And here, I feel I must invoke W.E.B DuBois, and mention that anyone's 'spiritual' (and I hesitate to use that word) experience, should only be considered relevant to that person, and not humanity as a whole. So don't think that meditation and running will lead to moments of clarity or enlightenment. I promise that the combo will not. But for me, there were two moments that caused an interlude in both my run and thought processes, where for a moment, I understood what I was seeing. I didn't understand the meaning of life or the workings of the universe. But I did, somehow, truly understand the small part of nature I was experiencing. And both times, a sense of well-being and knowing invaded my consciousness.
So, enough of the woo woo. That is a small glimpse of what I normally don't share. If I get enough comments or emails, I'll write a bit more about my meditation and my concurrent bastardization of two different types of Buddhism. I would love for more of my friends and readers to experience the exquisite mundaneness of meditation. Let me know if you have read this far and want to know more.
So for now... umm... namaste... I guess.
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